Congratulations! Your parenting style is…
As an in-charge parent, you’re your tween’s manager. No matter what mess they’re facing, they know they can trust you to have a plan and get them to where they need to be.
Your discipline style is strict. Which is to say, you might be results oriented — you prefer to create a plan and have people follow it to get the desired outcome.
You likely avoid getting overly emotional and tend to get right to the point which can make your kids feel like there’s no room for telling stories and having lengthy discussions about things that matter to them. You’re practical, energetic, and oh so ready to help them solve their problems.
Here’s the thing though, without a healthy amount of unstructured downtime, children raised by parents with a strong sense of authority are more likely to struggle with self-regulation (aka. the skill set that makes turning down a second red velvet cupcake easy-peasy).
So practice balancing your need to bluntly point out issues and offer solutions, by asking questions and allowing your kids time to process situations. Trust me, your kids will thank you in the long term.
“We never know the love of the parent till we become parents ourselves.” — Henry Ward Beecher
How to make the most of your time as a boss parent…
- Add listening to your tween to your daily task list. Psychology professor Larry Rosen, Ph.D. says, “Communication is the crux of parenting. The ratio of parent listening to parent talk should be at least five-to-one. Talk one minute and listen for five.”
- Listen with curiosity and ask good questions instead of immediately offering solutions. Even when you know the best solution. Coach the solution by asking good questions that help them think their way to a solution.
- Recognize that your tween’s style of getting things done is probably different than yours. Help them set up routines that work for their personality type. You’ll empower them to step into greater independence and you’ll get the result you want – done in a way that works for them.
Hold up — let me introduce myself!
Hey there, I’m Marina Gabor 👋 I’m the mother of three teenage daughters. When I’m not driving them to work or extra-curricular activities, I’m changing lives by helping parents and tweens build communication skills, routines, and life skills that will give them a good foundation for navigating the tumultuous teen years.
Yep, you heard right — whether it’s helping tweens learn how to manage themselves at home alone, taking care of siblings or other people’s kids, I empower tweens to take responsibility for their actions and give them practical ways to demonstrate maturity.
Think you could use a little extra support? Register your child for a Stay Safe! Home Alone or Babysitter Course. Together, we’ve got this 🙌
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